Growing up I was not the girl who did
handstands and cartwheels. I was scared to hang upside down. It made me feel
sick and disorientated. As an adult, I can look back and realise I was bound up
in fear. I did not trust my body to support me.
When I was twelve years old, I was diagnosed
with scoliosis. From what I remember, it was considered to be quite mild and I
really didn’t think much of it. However, I now realise that my scoliotic body
has had a greater impact on me than I first thought. This is the story of my
journey within my scoliotic terrain.
I have always been aware that my body is not
symmetrical. One side is shorter and more compressed than the other. At times,
my right shoulder feels tight and rigid. My right foot naturally turns outward.
I have a slight tilt in my neck. As a teenage girl, I was very self-conscious,
particularly in the summer time when swimming togs were common attire. Thinking
back, I don’t remember ever relating my physical asymmetry to my scoliosis.
Maybe, I was too young to make the connection.
During my twenties and thirties, I had lower
back problems, which were exacerbated by pregnancy. The only relief I found was
in a regular yoga practice. Yoga has been my mainstay – the one thing to which
I have always returned. When I practice consistently, I am a different person:
physically, mentally and emotionally. With that in mind, I finally undertook my
yoga teacher training with Carrie-Anne Fields at My Health Yoga in Brisbane.
That decision has changed the way I experience life within my body.
As part of my teacher training, I was
practicing yoga almost every day. I had this mental mindset, as many new
teachers can probably attest to, that I had to perform every pose perfectly. “How
else could I possibly teach others if I could not do the poses myself?”
Consequently, I pushed my body to make it conform, not really knowing that I
was doing more harm than good. The first indication was pain through my right
hip and gluteal. This pain would return after every yoga class, at times being
so intense I could barely walk out of the room. Still, I said nothing, thinking
that I would just have to be better. As I progressed through my training, my
ego started to dissipate and I tuned in to one of the key principles of yoga –
non-violence to self and others (ahimsa). One of my wonderful My Health teachers,
who is also a physiotherapist, explained that not every body is designed to do
every posture. It took me a while to assimilate this piece of information. I
had just assumed that one practices yoga, becomes more strong and flexible and
performs the pose. End of story.
Then I started to take more care with my body.
I pulled out the old x-rays of my spine and I researched. I decided that the
reason my hip was giving me so much grief was due to a tight psoas muscle on my
right side. I worked on lengthening through this area and I started to find a
small amount of relief. I also worked at a metaphysical level, trying to let go
of my ‘baggage’ and giving more to myself. It was during this time, I came
across the website of Narelle Carter-Quinlan, a yoga teacher who delves
specifically into the realm of scoliosis, spinal health and back-care. The next
step in the developing awareness of my body was about to begin.
After completing my teacher training with My
Health Yoga, for which I will be forever grateful, I enrolled in a
teacher-training course with Narelle. Together, these two courses have transformed
my life.
What is
Scoliosis?
Quite simply, scoliosis refers to a curvature
of the spine. In reality, scoliosis is anything but simple. It is a complex, three-dimensional
shift in the axial path of the spine. There are two main types of scoliosis. Structural
scoliosis is a permanent condition, mostly idiopathic in nature, developing
during an adolescent growth spurt. In contrast, functional scoliosis develops
as a result of an underlying condition and is not necessarily permanent.
Approximately 80% of structural scoliosis is
idiopathic. In order to receive a formal diagnosis, the curve needs to be
greater than 10° from midline. More females than males are diagnosed
with idiopathic scoliosis. This type of scoliosis results in a change of spinal
structure. Functional scoliosis mostly impacts at the level of connective
tissues and muscles. It develops as a result of an underlying condition, such
as inflammation or poor postural habits. A functional scoliosis responds much more
rapidly to corrective treatment than a structural scoliosis.
Curve patterns in
scoliosis are either a ‘C’ or ‘S’ shape and are named according to the location
of the curve within the spine: cervical, thoracic or lumbar. The curve can be
contained within one region, or can impact across regions, e.g. thoracolumbar
scoliosis. When describing scoliosis, reference is made to the ‘convexities’
and ‘concavities’ of the curve. On the convex side of the curve, the muscle
mass is often overstretched, and the bony structure can feel quite rigid, while the bone density is lower. A thoracic
convexity is often most noticeable as a ‘rib hump’ in a forward bend. Scoliosis
is named according to the direction of the convexity, e.g. ‘right thoracic
scoliosis’. On the concave side of the curve, muscles, tendons and ligaments
are tight and retracted. Yoga works to lengthen through the concavity, creating
strength, length and space.
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| sourced from Gary Leung |
Scoliosis is different
for every individual, as people all experience their bodies in different ways.
Some of the impacts of scoliosis include:
- · back,
neck and/or shoulder pain
- · instability
of the spinal joints
- · imbalance
in the muscles
- · poor
limb integration
- · asymmetry
of the body
- · respiratory
difficulties and decreased lung volume
- · weaker
muscle strength, particularly in upper body and quadriceps
- · vestibular
imbalances (e.g. spatial awareness, sensory integration)
- · low bone
mineral density
- · anxiety,
caused by the over-facilitation of the sympathetic nervous system
- · decreased
tonicity in organs
- · poor
body awareness
- · feelings
of emotional imbalance and restriction
What
does yoga have to offer the scoliotic body?
Personally, I have found this
journey amazing. For the first time in my life, I feel like I inhabit my body.
I no longer have the hip pain I was experiencing. I have an increased awareness
of my physical self and I know what postures are beneficial for me. There is
more strength in my spine and it feels as though a sense of calm has spread
throughout my entire back body. My
nervous system has settled and I feel freedom within. The creation of physical
space within my body has been emotional. During my practice, I had a moment in
which I suddenly realised I have spent my whole life feeling restricted:
physically, mentally and emotionally. In that moment of realisation, I also
felt extreme release. It’s hard to explain, but in that moment, I felt free.
Even as I write, my emotions are rising once more.
I am no longer that girl who is
scared to hang upside down, in fact I relish in the opportunity to do so. I
recently took myself into my first headstand, with feelings of great elation.
When I practice inversions, my brain begins to re-pattern as it adjusts to the
new orientation. I no longer feel anxiety. I don’t move into panic. Instead, I make
sure I have done my research so I know where my weight should be placed. I know
which parts of my body to align. I know which muscles to engage. This has helped
me tremendously. It has given me confidence in my body and in its ability to
support me.
I now trust myself more.
This experience has changed my teaching. I help
others to explore the landscape of their body, rather than working solely from
my own. I breathe with them and tune in to their experience so that I have a
better idea of what to offer. Ultimately, through yoga, I want to invite spaces
into their body. Not just physical spaces, but emotional spaces as well, so
that they too can learn to trust and let go.
References
Miller, E.B. Yoga for Scoliosis (Therapeutic Back Care). Elise Browning Miller,
California, 2003.
Monroe, M. Yoga
and Scoliosis: A journey to health and healing. Demos Medical Publishing,
New York, 2012.
Four Common Curve Patterns Illustrations by Gary Leung
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